Breastfeeding in America

[aelfie]

A lot of people have been thinking about it lately.

In the last month Newsweek has published 3 articles about it. Parenting Magazine did a photo montage following a nursing mom for the day. What gives?

People are getting pissed off. And its a good thing.

For the past 20 years or so OB/GYN's and Pedis have been shoving down our throats that "Breast is Best". Which is great! Until recently, numbers of first time mothers attempting to breastfeed is way up. (Last year the numbers went down) But there's a problem with their follow through. The numbers have at least halved by 6 months and are a small (but vocal!) minority at one year.

WHY?

As one of the articles in Newsweek pointed out America is screwed up in the head about it (my phrasing, not theirs) American's have this attitude of "Oh, yes, breastfeeding is best for the baby, but OH MY GOD did you see that woman expose her breast and is actually breastfeeding in public? How obscene! How dare she!!!!" And therein lies the problem. We say we are supportive, but we don't follow through with it.

Workplaces don't provide comfortable, quiet, private, "lactation rooms" for their nursing moms. Moms' get hassled by people while nursing in public. Moms and their nurslings get thrown off planes. Women are harrassed for "indecent exposure". Barbara Walters states on her national show that sitting next to a nursing mom on a plane makes her "uncomfortable".

Did you know that American women have no legal right to nurse in public (at least in most states)? Newsweek pointed out that an attempt to change this is underway. US legislators are trying to pass a federal level protection for nursing women. They are also attempting to require workplaces to provide lactation rooms and for paid breaks for their nursing employees. On one hand, this pleases me that something is finally getting done. On the other hand, its royally pissing me off that its taking federal legislation to protects babies rights to be fed when they are hungry.

It shouldn't take federal oversight for women to be able to breastfeed their children! And all these stupid modesty coverups are absolutely making the problem worse. Not only is it buying into the whole "A breast is a sexual object" crap it actually draws more attention to what you are doing! I'm sorry, but lifting up your shirt and latching a baby on is a lot less attention grabbing than draping this huge thing over your upper body and fumbling around 'cause you can't see what you are doing. And its denying the baby the one thing s/he needs besides the milk in the breast, the sight of his mommy's face!

I went out with my mom friends the other night (The Pasta Pomodoro fiasco) and we got into a rather heated discussion about it. C's argument is that a woman should be modest and cover up when nursing because it might offend other people. My attitude is (shock here) Fuck 'em! If it bothers them, its not my problem. My baby is hungry, I'm feeding him/her. And by saying that Mom should be modest is inherently not supportive. Saying that modesty is required is essentially saying that what mom is doing is sexual. Americans need to get over themselves and the idea that a boob is nothing but a sexual object.

So, Nursing Mom's of America! Whip those boobs out and feed your children openly and with pride. Hold your head high and spit in the eye of any asshole who tries to hassle you.

Comments

[psi-star-psi.livejournal.com]

*drool* Boobies!

Er...I'm not helping am I.

Here, this should be more helpful.

No? Oh, well, I tried. And you should change the icon to the blue pregnant chick. Just sayin'.

[ross-teneyck.livejournal.com]

You know, I've been around a fair number of nursing moms, and most of them were able to nurse without noticeably flashing anyone. I mean, most of the time there's a baby in front of the breast; and apparently a little practice makes it possible to engage and disengage fairly discreetly.

Not, you understand, that I was trying to catch a glimpse or anything. Because that would be wrong.

[airporter.livejournal.com]

The helpful comments will start here maybe. Living in the ghetto as I do, I've only been exposed to a couple of nursing moms. My reactions were (in no particular order.)

Eww, Cool, Aren't you cold?, and Does that hurt?

For the first reaction I beg forgiveness, for the lady in question was of a sour bent and I'm a sponge for the energy of anyone and everyone around me. In the latter cases, the ladies were obviously comfortable and going about their business.

I do feel, though, that a room I find chilly fully clothed...

[puzzld1.livejournal.com]

Aren't I all Ms Commenty today? Too tired to post on my own and you are testifyin' on subjects near to my heart and salient in my world right now.

I am exclusively breastfeeding right now and pumping at work. My pumped supply is dwindling because the ambient noise of working in a school for autistic kids is really inhibiting, mmuchas I love them. Finding time to pump is also a trick. The support just isn't there. I am terrified that my supply will not keep up with her demand. I don't want to give her formula. I know it's not poison, but the thought makes me want to cry.

Nursing in public-yeah that's a treat. Next time someone tells me at the food court at the mall to put a blanket over the baby's head, I'm gonna suggest that they put it over their own head if they don't want to see. So thanks for the shout out. Next time I whip out a tit at the mall, I'll know you are somehwhere cheering me on :-)

[allanh.livejournal.com]

I'm gonna disagree with you on ONE highly specific point: I don't think it's unreasonable for a nursing mother to cover her boob with a small blanket or diaper if she's nursing in public. This goes double for in restaurants.

It's a trade-off ... you should be able to nurse your baby any damn place you want, but not if you have to flash half the room to do it.

I've watched you breastfeed all three of your kids, and you manage to do it quietly and discreetly. However, most other nursing moms I've watched don't seem to be able to do it, and end up showing their tits.

I don't think it's a huge imposition on a nursing mother to take, for example, a clean diaper out of her baby bag before nursing ('cause she's probably gonna use it to burp the kid afterwards, anyway), and place it over the boob while the kid's using it.

So my take on it is, I will defend your right to nurse - discreetly - in public just about to the death.

Now, I'm personally not offended by seeing your tits. But I think it's definitely rude to flash tits, dick, balls, ass, or pussy at someone in public. (Certain street fairs, nudist colonies and camps aside.)

[allanh.livejournal.com]

...and that should be "Nursing Moms of America!", without an apostrophe. :)

[rephetibel.livejournal.com]

It's better than it used to be. This conversation occurred at Ross's first well-baby checkup back in 1968.

Pediatrician: How much does he take at the first feeding?

Me: I don't know. I'm nursing him.

Pediatrician: Well, how much does he get total throughout the day?

Me: I don't know. I'm nursing him.

Pediatrician: But you HAVE to know!

moll

[(Anonymous)]

As for the whole subject, I'm all for breastfeeding rights. On a plane, in a restaurant, in a furniture store (story from another forum), whatever, wherever, in any way the mother feels comfortable. There shouldn't be any laws barring public feeding.

On a personal level, however, I think there's a nice happy medium between draping a tent over yourself, in your car, any time your baby gets hungry and, say, lifting your shirt up to your chin and pulling your bra all the way down before the baby's even in your arms. Jus sayin.

As for the, "Breasts aren't sexual!" argument. Uh. Yeah they are. Among the Bush People, no. Here yes. If they're not sexual, why not run around shirtless all the time? Why wait until you have a baby? In our society breasts are sexual. It's not "wrong," it's just one part of our culture. In some countries hair is sexual, in others only the genitals are sexual. Every society is different, and you have to expect some level of intolerance for exposing a part of yourself that is widely considered sexual.

Now, if you're actually just lifting/removing enough of the clothing to give access to the baby, possibly flashing a nipple for a moment, and then only exposing a bit of skin on the breast mound, I don't really see any reason for anyone to complain. It's pretty easy to look away. It's a difficult subject for me to really explain my feelings on. I guess I just think consideration should go both ways. People around you should be considerate of your need to feed your child, and you should be considerate, or at least mindful, or the possible sensibilities of the people around you.